mordinary_3

Always Something More
2019-07-10 15:41:39 (UTC)

STARVATION

Today is good. real good. because i'm starving myself. Its been days of this and i feel so alive, and i feel that.. in a few weeks, ill shred the pounds, and hopefully feel sexy, but look it too. i want food so bad, but i don't at the same time. my hunger makes me realize that its working, and i'm a size 4 but i hate who i see in the mirror. absolutely hate it. i question why my husband ever fell in love with me or why he calls me beautiful. So i am going to work on this. starving, this fasting method, hell, i mean Jesus did it. cant be as "unhealthy" as people think it is. but i don't care if it is. i secretly throw up my food after meals sometimes, and i love the feeling. its like a release, and i wont stop until i am where i want to be. the one down side is exhaustion. but i have been downing zero calorie energy drinks to subdue that. and Aderall. everyone asks me how i am making so much progress. I cant tell them what i'm really doing, but i love that they like my look and that is ultimately what i desire, is for everyone to think i look amazing. and i wont stop until i get there. whatever it takes.




Ad: