chae

from my heart
2019-04-28 04:45:17 (UTC)

death

12:45 am
grrrls - aviva
i logged onto discord and there was this dude named brett... i used to talk to him but i wasnt so close to him. i found out he passed away because he was hit by a car. and now i feel so triggered. i feel like there is something with me and death. i take it out of control and i feel so angry and upset. i dont know what it is but death makes me go crazy. i have so many thoughts.

like how quick someone can die. i wish i never found out he passed away because it makes me feel like i will go insane. i dont know whats wrong with me. i hate death i hate it so much. and i hate myself for wishing that id rather die but holy fuck i dont even know anynmore what life is why the heack what is the point im having an existential crisis.


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