nerd™

the anger games
2019-04-08 22:09:13 (UTC)

777 days. alone but not really.

a very lonely night. it's not like I don't have anyone to talk to, I could text B or Di or Em if I wanted but.. what would I even say? we'd have the typical short conversation we've always been dancing around and I know they wouldn't say it but it's very annoying.
it's foolish to wish for someone who would want to talk to me because they actually like me not because they feel bad or sorry for me. I can never be a friend or a lover, I'm a literally a burden. I'm the colleague you smile politely at because we see each other every business day, not the kind you'd want to see on a weekend. that's just how I am. and I don't think there's anything I can do. it's just my personality I guess. maybe some people are meant to stay alone.
and still, i feel like I'm lonely in my own head. nobody wants to tolerate me, not even myself.




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