2019-03-07 01:34:18 (UTC)


Where do I begin on this one? So many things went wrong. Like usual. I just wish time had a rewind button so I can go back and fix everything I messed up such as the one relationship that meant the entire world to me. God I wish I could have that back. Changing the subject.....

Have you ever felt so alone that you don't know what to do anymore so you keep on trying to make yourself think the best solutions why you are alone but it doesn't work so you feel so much worse. The only thing that can pretty much sum up my life is a roller coaster. Lately on the roller coaster I have been in the middle. Towards the top but also towards the bottom. I struggle tryna figure out my feelings sometimes. It honestly sucks not knowing how you feel or where you belong. Like actually wtf am I? Who is Kaiah Schmidt? I obviously don't know her. Hell I have never been able to figure out who she is. Who I am. My life is a closed book. I don't tell anybody shit. But some people are better are reading me than others. And that is the scary part. If they could read my thoughts I don't think they would have any words left to say. Some of my thoughts are bizarre as hell but others are like fucking depressing. Guess nobody but I will know that.