Experienced Life
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2019-02-28 07:30:51 (UTC)

Love getting up in the morning

I love getting up in the morning. The first cup of coffee while it's still nice and quiet. Weighing yourself because this is the lightest you'll normally be for the day. Sitting up on my bed with my blanket over my legs. Playing some soft rock on Alexa. How can life not be so sweet? Sure, I wake up alone but being alone and lonely are two different things. I wake up and you know those times when you have or enjoying something you like only to find out it was just a dream? You know, like finding a stash of money or having some fun doing the nasty? Well, in my case, I wake up even happier because that Tacoma is still in my garage and is as real as can be.

The weather has been pretty nasty this past week. Haven't taken out my Tacoma yet so I went into the garage last night to check it out. The entire garage permeates of the new car smell. Nothin like it and the whole garage smelled like it. It's was smelling oh so much sweeting in the truck. I love the leather seats, checking out the lights, buttons, and all the fabulous features it comes with. Yes, I played with the sliding rear window, sunroof, and door windows along with the entertainment console. Synced up my phone so I can read email and texts on it too. Not sure if I want to keep that feature enabled in case I have passengers in my truck. Some stuff is personal and I wouldn't want the truck to be reading it out loud while peeps are in it. haha.

I added some mods. Minor stuff like the glove compartment and console area. They're just inserts to keep stuff organized. Like those closet organizers but for the automobile. haha.

Oh, I now know why I kind of tool second looks at the lady in the gym yesterday..Sarah..I now realize and now have to somewhat confess, she looks like my ex gf. Dang!!! haha. It hit me last night that she does. Almost ashamed to admit it but it is my diary and I post shit on here. Some things would probably offend people ( I have) but too bad. This is where we sometime post our inner feelings and sometimes the far reaching inner fantasy fake "what if" feelings too. But fuck. Now I know why I was attracted to Sarah. Sigh... I guess my journey on recovery isn't 100% recovered yet but I will get there. Sometimes the memories of the past can effect your current life. I got this though. I know what past memories can do and what it means. It's just a memory. No time to waste because life is happening every day :)

I am happy, I also just got paid :) Tax are coming. No storm or rain today. Gym should be AMRAP day which I love love love. Well, time for my second cup of coffee.

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