Jilly Beans

Boys, Liberty, and Other Things That Nearly Killed Me
2019-01-25 02:44:24 (UTC)

Entry 16 - Letter to Mommy

Hi mommy,

First thing I want to say is I miss you so much. I know most of our lives were spent apart and I dont resent you for that. In fact, it made me appreciate you beyond anything. Words cannot do your sacrifice any justice. I dont think I am strong enough like you were. You spent your life away from us to work odd jobs just to send me and ate to very good schools, to provide what we need, to enable us to make something of ourselves.

I still cant believe you already died. It feels like youre still there, only waiting for me to write you an email or send you a message. I have always felt your presence even when we were far apart.

I remember the night before you died, I was the one left in the hospital to watch over you. I promised I will never cry in front of you but my heart felt very heavy that nught and I just can't stop crying and sobbing. Somehow, I knew you were slipping away. But that night I just cried and the feeling of sadness is inexplainable.

I dont think I can write anymore. It still hurts too much. I'll pen my thoughts when I'm feeling braver.

I love you very much, mommy. I miss you more than I can say.




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