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It's been quiet lately
Well, it's been nice and quiet these past couple of days. Work was quiet. No stress. Except for the gym, I stayed home and let my mind be at peace which I need. House is relatively clean. I've been eating right most of the week so far. At the gym, we've been focused a lot on our core this week. Funny it's not hurting and it feels nice and firm :)
Regarding my breakup mentality? I forgot about something. It is her loss. I forgot what my worth is. She won't find anyone like me. I remember she admitting telling me some things that was nice about me physically that I won't talk about. Also financially, we would have had it made. Now I know she is brown bagging a lot of lunches so no more frivolous lunches or dinners anymore. I just forgot. I forgot because I admit, I lost some self esteem.
Gonna have to do some bragging here. I never say nice things about myself. Always seem to be bad stuff because of my ego. Always telling myself I'm not worth shit. But I change my mind and telling me ego to go to hell. I have a lot of friends because I'm a good person. I'm very fit and go to my crossfit 5-7 days a week. The program is so good. Not knowing anything about it but the coaches do. I am so toned overall from head to toe. I have no issues with E.D. I can last way longer than most peeps and even my ex gf says I have the hardest cock she ever had. I have a pretty good job. Everyone is always hoping to get a 6 figure a year job. Well, I got one. I'll never buy a Lamborghini but I know I will never suffer financially. I have a retirement so I will be good even after I retire but no reason to because I'm in I.T. and as a Network Engineer, I can keep doing it till I feel like not working anymore. Yet, it's like play sometimes. It's fun. Just like the gym. An hr feels like 20 min. Going there isn't a pain. It's not like I'm looking at the clock trying to get through my routine so I can go home. I'm never really bored. I have a lot of hobbies from darts, kayaking, fishing, camping, gun range, wine tasting, hiking, traveling, etc, etc.
When I put all my positives together, I actually feel good about myself. I am more than fine with who and what I am. So... the ex did lose. Not me :) She will never find someone like me again. It is her loss more than my loss. I don't know why my head was thinking the opposite. I don't know why I was thinking I was the one that lost. She is the one that lost. I got my life to live. I need to remember what I am and move on and see what's in store for 2019. Yeah, I know I will have dark days. No one is immune from days like those but I am too strong to take life laying down. I got this!!