Even my core is falling apart
So, I've been bragging about the one thing that I have and that's my core of friends that I value a lot. I think I lost "M". That's ok. She's a dove that can't be caged anyway and should be free to fly and live life to it's fullest. However, there is not a kink in the Core armor. My core friends and I got together a couple of days ago. When I say core, I mean the friends that you'd do whatever it is they ask for at the drop of a hat. If I was working on a Network project where it's a multi-million dollar project and we're turning it up. If these friends were to call me and say they needed my help right away, I'd drop whatever I am doing and would go and help them. Why? It's because they are my true friends. Solid to the core. Also, I have a Union and I may be able to get away with it anyway. haha.
Same with my recent newly acquired core friend "M". Dang it!! I fell in love with her. Fuck me!!!! Sigh....... So where the hell was I going with this again? I dunno. My head got snapped back pretty hard last night so I'm not thinking right. I'm not seeing ghosts so I'm guessing I'm to that messed up. Oh yeah. I remember now. My kink in my core peeps.
Yeah.... so. except for me... everyone of my peeps are either going together or married. Well.... one of the ladies is now after me. She says she wants me. Now this is a woman that I've also known for almost 20 years. Sure, I lost a lot of weight and I look a little better now that I work out and lost all that weight. So I don't mind a little innocent looks here and there. But she said something that bothers the hell out of me. We were all drinking but that's not an excuse. She just flat out told me she wants me. She wants me because her husband won't have long to live. My core friends are way overweight They party hard. They just happened to be very overweight.
The same husband that this wife of his that is hitting on me had a problem and had to go to the hospital. His wife (the one that is hitting on me) asked me what I do for nutrition since I've been doing great with working out and eating right. I gave her a good program of healthy choices of protein, carbs, and veggies to eat. Not to make it too overwhelming. Just a very good baseline of the foods to eat. So, she started prepping meals for him and since then, he has been losing weight. Good for him. But now his wife wants to prepare for her future when he dies and latch on to me? Hell no!!! What the hell is that? Her husband is still alive and she's telling me she wants to be with me because her husband isn't going to last?
Am I in the same world as these people or what? I'm not like these reality shows we see. I don't go fucking other people's wives. I don't become an RSVP for when someone's husband dies!!! So.. Even my untouchable core is starting to fall apart. What the hell?!!
Meanwhile, my dart league is done with X Mas and New Years break. Our league is going to continue on again. We are in first place by one game. I haven't really practiced in two weeks. Also, I sort of injured my left throwing arm. My elbow is jacked. During gym class, I missed the punching bag and overextended my arm. I messed it up. Just writing my signature is messed up. My dart suck right now.
Feels like I'm losing a grip on things. I tried to be true to my friends. I try to not be an asshole. But yet, everything is falling apart. I miss my babe "M"". I love her. That's all I know. I know it isn't right but I always say what I feel so why change now?