Canadian Cutie

Life through my spiritual eyes❤️
2019-01-03 14:33:00 (UTC)

Meeting up tonight

I am home and glad today is over.. Something really strange is happening and I don't understand why. In an entry a few days ago, I wrote about getting crank calls at work. Well I got more today.. Then today when I was leaving work there was a black car parked off to the side where mine is parked. I didn't really pay attention when I noticed it moving and walked to my car looking at my phone. Well, when I unlocked my car I saw this car was stopped directly behind mine. When I looked up, He left..in a hurry. I was able to see it was a Man. I followed Him as that's the way I leave out but He did His best to keep ahead. Fast forward.. I come home.. change and I went to check the mail and what I swear is that car, parked a house over, on the street. It's the same car, I am almost positive. It's the same color and style. I am not brave enough to go out and see if He's in it because the windows are tinted. I took a picture of the licence plate from my window however. This is concerning because.. One, why was He stopped behind my car at work looking directly at me then take off when I noticed Him...two how did He know where I live because He was ahead of me leaving. Making me nervous.. Not sure who it is. Will have to keep an eye on it.
Scaring me a bit.. Try to focus on other things til I know anything for sure.

I was looking over old entries in my journal before I deleted them and In the past I filtered some of what I wrote here because at one point I knew my ex knew of this journal and read it so I was cautious not to upset Him.. I know now He is not reading it anymore so I am free to write my feelings and be brutally honest.

I was texting with B, the Dom and He asked me to meet up with Him tonight, to talk.. so I agreed, so tonight at 7:30 I will be meeting Him to talk, not sure what about but He wants to see me, talk to me about something.. I told Him I don't feel like being out in public so we agreed to meet privately..I know I know lol, but we have several times before. I trust Him. Convenient He's from my city lol. I think I know what He wants to talk about. He's adamant about having me as His submissive.. He knows emotionally I am not ready but He threw my own words back in my face today about dating my last Dom just after breaking up with my boyfriend prior to Him. Sounds confusing but it's not lol. I knew my words would come back to bite me lol. There is a release that comes from submission. It's a good way to just feel and not think. To let someone take out the loud noise in Your head and replace it with silence. I have been with Him 4-5x now and in His presence I feel submissive and it has been intimate (not intercourse lol) There is also the way He touches my hair and head in a way that puts me immediately in a submissive state and kissing Him is very addictive so If I can feel my submission..maybe it's worth giving it a try, It's something I am seriously considering as long as He understands where I am coming from. I will know more once I hear Him out tonight.

My shrink called me while I was driving home as I missed my appointment this week (I forgot lol) He just wanted to see how I was. I explained a little of what is going on and for the first time He stated He felt my past relationship was unhealthy for me and He thinks it's good idea I am moving on. I have to agree. He said just because you love someone, doesn't mean you should be together. I would agree in this case.. So I am confident this is the best thing for me and I feel positive moving forward.

My friend here SS gave me a name suggestion.. He said Blue Eyed Angel... for my blue eyes and He says my personality is angelic lol, don't know about that but my intentions are pure as is my heart so that's a possibility. He also suggested Angel Eye's.. I kinda like that :) hmm, May have a winner.. Thank you to the others who gave me suggestions too, all really good suggestions..

Anyways, may update tonight after I see B, don't know.. time will tell

Have a wonderful day all <3