Scream Above the Sounds
Rhythm, Routine & Birthday Planning
We kept things going strong today with another run and workout. We're gonna keep things going throughout the week, it is so draining but man, it feels good. It feels great to be getting outdoors, to be in the company one of my best friends a bit more and also, working and improving myself. A small improvement everyday is all I ask, I don't want to overexert myself. I find myself feeling quite sick afterwards, I don't wanna push too hard.I'll put my progress and what I did in this entry as soon as my friend sends me everything, I couldn't log it on my phone today as I didn't take it with me.
Shoulder press - 10kg plus bar
Behind shoulder press - 2.5kg plus bar
Shoulder fly's - 2kg per arm
Lawnmowers - 15kg per arm
Tricep raises - 2kg per arm
Shoulder swing 7.5kg
Plank - 15sec
Maybe this stuff isn't very good or even impressive but it's nice to keep track, it will help me improve and get better.
It feels really good to have a routine and as I mentioned, just getting out of the house, it makes me feel so much happier to actively be doing something; rather than wasting away staring at the same four walls for X amount of hours a day. I still find my nights a bit limited and lifeless at times but this is an improvement and something I'm desperate to keep going. I do really enjoy the company of my friends, especially late at night. I would be lost without people like Ad, Aaron, Taya, just to name a couple! They keep me grounded, distracted and importantly, I love their company. They can make me forget about things and we can just chill and have a fun time together.
All those times I mentioned about my parents spoiling me, things never change. I'll be 28 in 2 weeks and my mum has just told me that she's going to buy me a Nintendo Switch for my birthday. I'm super hyped! I feel really bad because it's well over £300, I didn't ask for anything for Christmas and I think my parents feel bad. I wish they wouldn't. That being said, I do really, really want a Switch so I'm really happy! I'm getting it in a bundle with Super Smash Bros Ultimate (I'm a Falco main, don't @ me) and the new Pokémon 'Let's go!' game. I'm buzzing for it. I have college on the day of my birthday and it's a pretty long day so I probably won't do anything big for it. Maybe me and my parents will go for a meal on the weekend before it or something like that. I'm not too big on alcohol these days, despite how many entries I may type when I'm drunk. I guess I just feel too old for all these crazy nights now. I have time to decide, we'll have to wait and see.
I'm dreading turning 28, it gets me really down. Even though I'm making huge progress now, I really do feel like I've wasted my life and I haven't achieved anything. People are getting engaged, having families and here I am; waiting for my Nintendo Switch. I probably wouldn't have it any other way though, right now anyway. I'm building, or rebuilding myself should I say. I'm going to be a better person, I'm going to be leaner, fitter, hungrier, stronger, more successful and hopefully, in time, HAPPIER. I know this isn't going to be easy but I've come too far to give up now. I'm not going to lie down for anything and I promise, give it a year or two's time. I'll be somebody.
I have no real plans for the rest of the night. Everybody is raving about 'Bandersnatch' on Netflix and I am REALLY into decision making games and choices. I absolutely loved the Telltale games: Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, A Wolf Among Us, I absolutely adored them. Everybody is recommending this to me so I think I'm gonna give it a shot tonight!
Have a good day.