Scream Above the Sounds
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2018-12-18 23:25:01 (UTC)

20 Days

I have 20 days off college, what the hell am I going to do?! The weekends are long enough! I shouldn't complain, the first few days are going to feel great. I'm going to be drinking, playing good music. I mean, I'll still be alone but maybe it'll uplift my predictably bad moods for a while. I'm going to try and put myself out there a bit more and hopefully encourage myself and others to leave the house and at least do something. I really need to go to the cinema and see Creed II but I don't really know who I could take to see it. I don't really know anybody who is that big on the Rocky franchise. I will probably end up going on my own.

I've been invited to a New Year's Eve party so I'll go to that. I will definitely drink myself beyond that night, I'm looking forward to saying goodbye to this year. It's been the most painful, without a doubt. There has been some good but not enough. I'm still very bitter and hurt about things I did, said and maybe even some things that I didn't do. It's pointless to dwell, I know that now. I just wish I could change things. The point is, it's the year that is over, not my life. I'll learn from these mistakes and I promise, I'll be better. I am better than this. I'll have to find other things to do throughout these holidays or I'm going to drive myself insane.

Maybe I'll play some single player games to pass the time or something. I want to replay Final Fantasy 7 and 8 so maybe I'll make a start on one of those. I also want to complete Ocarina of Time and Majora's Mask again, maybe Broken Sword 1 too. I've reinstalled The Sims too, I still need to design my friend in that. I promised I would design her and take a picture of it for her. I haven't spoken to her in a few days and I know she likes her space so I'm not going to bother her until she comes to me. I'll get the picture ready though.

I suppose that's all I've got for tonight. It's another boring lonely night but it's not been as bad as yesterday. I'll survive, I always do.