ish

ish
2018-12-15 06:00:31 (UTC)

chill

yeah...think daddy is right......taking a bit of a break is good maybe...can see a bit clearer things.......seems it all gets a bit chaotic at times with our communication...and im sure alot is on how we understand and interpet things from our individual backgrounds......perception makes a major difference and when you add circumstance like culture difference or country..language...it starts getting complex.......

in alot of ways sometimes seems learning to communcate with my non speaking dawter when she wasnt talking was easier....most like cuse i was her culture...her world i knew completely ......and when you talk with your hands ...is pretty straight forward....not any emotional inflections to worry on....which is another culprit lol.....cuse dawter has no understanding of tone...sarcasium...or otherwise lol.....can create drama when you dont understand tone of what is being said.................

so will be patient...let my belly settle with all this chaos lately....not get bent or overthink.....just chill ....let it come back naturally as it should.....
trying to understand why...i think i go into on my own mode when daddy goes.......and when he comes back i dont go back into daddy mode........and get a bit cocky for sure.........is hard to just change gears i guess in the moment....always easier to go back to how you where i think...maybe not....brain muscle memory..........lol...who knows is wierd...............


wow so wierdly cool.....was talking to sharon on facebook...and she has had an sl account for 11 yrs now lol omg crazy...........she keeps giving all the stuff she makes .....had to tell her to stop.......lol but shes pretty great ......always alot of fun and creative.....i guess her and sprata even though divorced still get along great......so that is cool......he is pretty awesom....was a great teacher....taught me to armour and always relied on my eye and thoughts...always made me feel i was just as good as one of the boys that worked so hard armouring.....i wish i had a passion for it ............is hard on the elbow for sure........ouch.....still not right..but damn i did develope those blacksmith muscles lol damn....now i can do much with them that sucks...i can pull myself accross the ground when my back goes out LOL...LOL Omg i make myself laugh so bad sometimes..ok ok ok..seriously.......................




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