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2018-10-10 13:53:56 (UTC)

World Mental Health Day

I made a post in regards to this on my Facebook today. I don't really post much on Facebook at all but the fact some people are determined to steal and jump in on other people's grief and trauma makes me sick. I'll link it down below. It takes some inspiration from my One More Light diary entry so you'll see some of that in here too.

"You won't find me posting about things much or ever typing anything as personal at this, but I can't deal with people talking as if they know what depression truly is, just because they feel a bit down or want to jump in on other people's grief or trauma.

Depression is something that I have dealt with since I was 15 years old and it grinds my gears when people try and make other people's grief their own, just for a bit of attention or a few likes on Facebook or whatever the goal is. You should count your blessings that you'll never ever have to deal with it because it's torture. Depression is something that will consume you and make you feel completely worthless. I lost everything this year and I came extremely close to ending my life. This isn't a post for pity or sympathy, this is a post to try and make people understand. It's amazing when you see people posting about World Mental Health Day and they were the people who made fun of you, looked and talked down to you, made you feel like the smallest person in the world and bullied the shit out of you in school.

My perfect example of somebody with depression is Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. Chester had it all and it wasn't enough. That's the scariest fucking thought ever. He was married, he had 6 children, money was never an issue, he was successful, he was loved, he was SO loved....and it wasn't enough. A picture was taken of him and his family the day before he killed himself and you would never in a million years be able to tell that he felt the way he did. You never truly know what's going on inside somebody's head. It's heartbreaking. I'm scared I might end up going down the same road. I don't fancy myself to end up successful or even married with children but if I did, in the back of my mind, there is a self destruct button and I'm like a moth in the light. I'll press that button every single time.

That is what depression truly is. This isn't something that we need to acknowledge just for today. This should be everyday. Why can't people just be nice to one another? We have to save each other. It takes strength to be gentle and kind."

This isn't a post for pity or sympathy either. I just want people to read it and acknowledge it, because it angers me like no other. Some people don't have the first clue. We all need to save each other.