Scream Above the Sounds
Today was probably the best day I've had in college. Quite unusual because it's a Thursday and that involves Science and Maths, and I suck at both, but it was a really easy and fun day! I think the fact the sun was shining definitely helped.
Science is picking up and it feels like I'm constantly trying to find space in my brain to remember all of this stuff the teacher throws at us. I was stressing like crazy last night because I needed to hand my science paper in today. I completely forgot to give it to her. She didn't even ask for anybody's paper in the end. I'd give it to her, if you know what I mean? Ha, I shouldn't talk dirty, it doesn't suit me. There is something really attractive about her though. I noticed she actually has a Raichu tattoo as well. He's my favourite Pokémon. She's so easy to talk to and she really cares and wants us all to succeed. No, I'm not going to fuck my science teacher. The desire still isn't really there for anything sex related with anybody, I feel like things are slowly falling into place and I'm getting back to how I used to be but, I have a long way to go. I'm really attracted to and I may even go as far as to say, I'm falling for one of my best friends again, and this is bad. Bad for a number of reasons. I'm trying to distance myself from her a little bit, which annoys me because I love spending time with her. I couldn't even contemplate telling her how I felt, even though I know nothing will come of it. I'm not surprised this has happened, it's not the first time with her. There has been history and I've always had strong feelings for her. I actually turned her down in 2009, not because I wasn't attracted to her but because I was kinda getting involved with somebody else. I know a relationship isn't good for me right now. I gotta try and sort myself out and be happy and stop self-destructing. I just find myself thinking about her a lot. I've enjoyed spending a lot of time with her lately and she does make me happy. I don't really know what she thinks of me, it doesn't really matter I guess.
Long story short: My science teacher is hot > I think I'm falling for one of my best friends > fuck.
Anyway. We did experiments today which was really cool. There has been so much work and writing up and it was getting quite tedious. It was nice to get down to some practical stuff. The guys in my class really bonded today too. We all did the experiments together, had a bit of a laugh and even took a picture of us all in lab coats with goggles on. I uploaded it to my Instagram. It's nice to have that fun and togetherness. They're a good group of guys. The girls in the class are decent too, it's a nice group. People have suggested about going for a drink closer to Christmas. That would be fun. Our science teacher let us leave early so me and a few of the guys headed over to KFC. We had an hour and a half before Maths so we wandered into town. Maths wasn't too bad today either. I tend to struggle with maths but today we were covering percentages, that was a breeze. We finished early there too. I bumped into one of my best friends at the bus stop which was strange. I don't think me and him have been on a bus together in over 10 years, haha. He tends to drive everywhere. We chatted for about half an hour and agreed that we'd meet up quite soon.
The fire alarm went off just before Maths and I bumped into one of my oldest friends who worked at Primark on nights with me for a few years. Her name is Martine. She is one of my most favourite people I've ever worked with. She was a diamond. She was so warm, so friendly. She had great banter. She was older than me, she was about 40. I used to call her my "work mum". It was great to spend time with her and catch up. I really did miss her after she left nights. All in all, it was a good day! I'm feeling quite positive, I know it won't last but I have to enjoy it whilst I'm feeling like this. Tomorrow will be an easy day and then I can look forward to the weekend. The UFC is on and Conor McGregor will be fighting so I'll be looking forward to that. I need to re-write my English story this weekend too so I think I'll do that and maybe upload it in an entry to see what people think. Any feedback for that would be much appreciated.
I'm actually gonna fill my glass with disaronno and embrace a pretty chilled night out, for once. I hope everybody has a great evening.