Elirod

Atypicalkid
2018-09-28 09:08:52 (UTC)

i want to break free

It is two AM with nine minutes, the date is September twenty-ninth. I am thinking about my life what could have been but mostly what I am going to do. I just want to leave, I feel lost, empty and a little scared. I can sleep all day and be awake all night. I feel like I've been left behind, and it gives me anxiety. The world seems to keep on moving while I stand still. I've always been that one uninteresting type of person. I've only had two real friends, all we would do is drink and smoke marijuana. I guess we got along so well because we didn't have any goals, maybe because we lived in the moment not thinking about tomorrow. We went from being the high school pot heads to being nobodies. I took me a while to realize that I do not fit anymore. I don't fit with society nor my family and friends. I have stopped smoking, stopped hanging around my friends. I have been trying to find myself and its harder than how people make it seem. I don't get how or why they are happy, I feel like a total outcast. I am trying to break free, everyone has something going for themselves and I'm in my mid twenties with no aspirations. Just like how everyone is asleep dreaming preparing themselves for a new day while I'm typing how lost i feel, listening to "I want to break free" By Queen on repeat. I don't see a future, I not sure if i want it and I am ok with that. It is currently three-fourteen AM not tired but I guess it enough for today, thanks for letting me share even though i know no one will read this.




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