Street_smart

Experienced Life
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2018-09-27 22:28:55 (UTC)

Had a heart to heart with ex gf

So I actually had communicated with the ex gf. We chatted via text. I guess I wanted some closure about what happened. I wasn't exactly understanding what happened. She said that our relationship was interesting and good at first and all that but she just isn't ready for one (relationship) with everything she's juggling.

My response? I said that I didn't want to try to change her mind but that we never took it to the next step. By that, I mean that she didn't see the door she had and could use. I would've stepped up to bat. I would've taken some of the burden off of her. She just never let me in. She has that lone wolf mentality and if she'd only let me join the family I would've more than been willing to jump in and be one with them. It would've eased the burden of her being a single Mom. But I did say that she couldn't see. She is a lone wolf and I told her I suspected that she was like this for awhile now. She didn't even see the option of living life as a team and not running solo. I told her that we never left the stage of just being boyfriend/girlfriend and that we could've taken it to a higher level but it takes two. I was willing but she wasn't even seeing it as an option.

Her response? She said she'll make a note of that. lol I'm like huh? So cryptic to me but whatever.

I did say that we can't live in the past and that it'd be stupid to look back and haver regrets. Life is too short for that. So we ended it at that. We left the life360 app that I guess we no longer needed anymore. We agreed to keep in touch from time-to-time but I'm guessing we both know that's bullshit and just being nice as we parted.

I admit. I do hurt but I know that this breakup was needed. What's my future now? I don't know. I do know that whatever mistakes I made from my being me, I will change for the better. That I will not want anyone else to have to experience. Those two are being needy and that bullshit ultimatum I pulled that said " if we aren't going to move in together, why be together at al?l" Wrong to say but our goal was the same for the past year until the last couple of months. So at least I was following the path we said we'd go.


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