Scream Above the Sounds
Ad 2:
2018-09-20 08:05:29 (UTC)

Under the Weather

I felt so ill last night. I think something is going around. I've seen a lot of people posting things on Facebook about illness and suddenly, everybody's got it. It's one of those weird things though, where people will start reading something and then suddenly they will think; "I don't feel too well either, actually!" and then it just snowballs. "You're only as ill as you think" etc. In this case though, I feel awful.

I'm gutted I'm missing a day at college already and it's only my second week there. It feels really disappointing, especially after I was bragging to a friend about my 100% attendance to his 80%, haha. In a way, I'm glad it was today that I don't feel well because it's my worst day. It's Science & Maths. Maths has been quite challenging but I knew it would be. I really am trying my hardest and I'm doing a lot better than I thought I would. I just need to push on and really up my game. I need to get at least a C. Science will be okay because you pass via coursework, assignments etc. I'll be fine with that. I'm going to nail English too. I already feel super confident. I had to do a presentation Tuesday. I had to talk about three things that were important to me, things that I valued. I took a picture of me and my best friend at his wedding. A family picture of us in Hong Kong last year and finally, a list of things I wanted to do. I made an entry about the list earlier in the diary, possibly May. I made the list after I broke up with my ex girlfriend and I felt really depressed and suicidal. It kind of signalled "new beginnings" for me. Going back to college etc, sorting my life out. It was quite emotional. I had to stand up in front of everybody for about 10 minutes. I say "had to", he said we could stay in our chairs and do it but I didn't see the point. If you're going to do it, do it properly. Go big or go home. Plus they mentioned we will have to do more presentations in the future so why not throw yourself in the deep end now? Get as much practice in as possible. I'm glad to say, they loved it. Everybody clapped. I could see my lecturer actually tearing up. I didn't mean to cause that reaction but he wanted honesty, the truth, meaning and I think I delivered. I think that presentation really introduced me and set the tone. We went outside for a break afterwards and people I had not yet had a conversation with came up to me and told me it was a very impressive speech and I should be proud. Including the girl I have a small crush on, so that's a little victory. Woo. She didn't tell me on the day though, I think she was too shy. She told me yesterday. She sat next to me in Maths. She's pretty, she's funny too. I'm not looking for anything and the thought of being involved with somebody who already has a child isn't one I've thought about before. She's nice to talk to though, I hope to get to know her a little better.

When you're ill, you don't have to ring the reception at the college or anything like that. You just e-mail your tutors and that's it. I did that a few hours ago and tried to get some more rest. I'm going to go back to bed after I finish this. I'm struggling to keep my eyes open. My head is pounding. I hope I feel better tomorrow. Friday is my favourite day. It's ICT and then home time. I'll be out of the door by 12:30pm. I think people noticed how good I was with computers during a lesson yesterday. The lecturer called me to the front and I had to sit in her chair and demonstrate everything on the smart board. I didn't mind but I got bombarded afterwards and a lot of people were asking for my help. That always makes me feel good though, it's nice to know I have some expertise or I'm confident in an area. Another reason I hope to feel better tomorrow is, my best friend and his wife are having a house party. They moved in a while ago but everybody has been so busy, including them. We haven't had time to go over there or do anything. So it's kind of like a late housewarming. I haven't seen people in a while, so I'm looking forward to getting drunk and chatting some shit with them. I see my best mate and his wife once a week, but that's only because they take me to college. His wife is studying there too now. So I really appreciate the lift.

I guess that's it for me, for now. I might write more on previous subjects/entries later today. I'll see how I'm feeling.

Have a good day.


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