Scream Above the Sounds
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2018-08-17 06:29:45 (UTC)

The World Ain't All Sunshine and Rainbows

"Travel broadens the mind". I never really understood this quote until a while ago. Whilst I do agree that it's important and interesting to learn about other cultures and their way of life, it held another meaning for me.

I mentioned it in my entry when I originally got back from Sweden. There was a very weird awakening for me. It happened about 2 or 3 days into my holiday in Sweden. I don't really know what it was or what happened but being in a different location just completely changed my mood. I don't just mean a "Oh look at me, I'm on holiday. Party mode!" kinda mood either. It really opened my eyes and made me realise that the world and life are so much bigger and better than what's going on at home. The problems, the stress, whatever it is you're going through. It made me realise that I need to get a grip and move on with my life. Yes, there is a lot of pain, anguish and regret but now I have to just let go and get on with it. Before, it was easier said than done. Now, I'm ready. No more feeling sorry for myself or wishing I could change things. It's over with. No more moping. Get a grip, Edd, and make something of your life before it's too late. I really hope I can do more travelling next year. I have so many friends that I've met online that I would love to go and visit. I would definitely consider Sweden again. It was one of the best times of my life. I just finally feel like I'm thinking clearly. I hope this lasts.

Maybe it's because I was distracted and with my friends for a week straight. I don't really know. All I know is, I'm feeling better. I almost feel happy. It's such a weird and foreign feeling but I'm so glad about it. My mood does fluctuate but I feel I'm getting better everyday. I honestly felt amazing today. It could all be related to distractions. I spent a week in Sweden and then since returning I've kept myself busy and now I'm sinking a lot of time into the World of Warcraft expansion. Distractions or not. I'm feeling better, happier, mentally fitter/stronger. My life is going to change dramatically in a few weeks when I start studying. I know the first week or two of that is going to hit me hard and be a real reality check because I've been out of education for so long and I'm used to having a lot of free days. Regardless, I'm looking forward to that. I have a plan, I know what I want.

I've been watching the Rocky films recently. They're some of my favourites and are always good for psyching yourself up and motivating yourself. Sounds a little sad but hey, lets not bash on the Rocky films. They're great. Surprisingly, Rocky 6 is one of my favourites. Very emotional, very inspirational. One of my all time favourite quotes, I'm going to put it here because I know what I'm worth and I'm going to get what I'm worth. I'm not going to let nobody beat me anymore.

Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place, and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth, but you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that! I'm always gonna love you, no matter what. No matter what happens. You're my son and you're my blood. You're the best thing in my life. But until you start believing in yourself, you ain't gonna have a life.