Do Not Disturb

2018-05-19 20:03:50 (UTC)

I Believe So

I feel stupid. Maybe I am stupid. Gosh I need help. I'm clingy. I get jealous. I'm sensitive. Emotional. Crazy. All I've been writing and caring about is boys when they never like me back when Jairrius doesn't like me back but would rather be friends with benefits. When I mentioned it to him just to see what he was gonna say he said it so quick... So fast. Still talking to Marquis even though its been a week since we talked. He was saying something about minutes and data. Idk. I don't care. I don't know if I believe him but maybe that's my problem. Trusting people is hard to do. Jairrius says that I'm to clingy and I'm always getting jealous. I feel depressed. Maybe I am because I'm always in the bed and I never do anything productive and all I know how to do is be " lazy". Well, at lesst that's what my mom's been telling me and maybe she's right. I've been applying for jobs online recently. Lately.

Things about me:

Care to much about what everyone thinks
Low self-esteem
Barely happy
Thinks I might be depressed

Everything just gets worse for me. But only because I make it. Darian still has me blocked but it doesn't matter. And I'm pretty sure that he never wants to see me or hear my voice or see my face ever again. You get what I'm saying. I feel like I'm blabbering to much about how my life isn't perfect because well it isn't. Nobody's isn't. Unless you're a celebrity. Just my opinion. But the only way to make that happen is if I let it. I almost burned my thumb while lighting up an incent. Sounds like me. Sometimes I wonder if their is something wrong with me. I also feel as if, I can't do anything when I know I can but never try too. Everyone thinks that my brother is sooo perfect. Whilst me well... I'm me. Anyways this is all I have for now.

Write more as soon as possible


The Forgotten One