Scream Above the Sounds
Ad 2:
Digital Ocean
Providing developers and businesses with a reliable, easy-to-use cloud computing platform of virtual servers (Droplets), object storage ( Spaces), and more.
2018-05-03 03:03:11 (UTC)

Mixing Vodka and Emotions

3am, I just got home from a night out that went surprisingly better than I ever thought it would. The turn out was way better than what I had anticipated.

I feel really rough now. I'd been drinking since about 6pm and never really stopped. My friend hosted pre-drinks and he has a built in bar at his house so we abused that, then went in his hottub for a bit to chill out. A few drinking games later and a taxi into town and we were at the club. It felt really nice to see old friends again. I don't really want "going out every wednesday" to be a thing again because it brings back some bad memories and it's just not healthy generally. I don't want to fall into a really bad place or habit and end up becoming alcohol dependent. I must admit, I do genuinely feel so much more alive when I'm drinking though. I just have to try and be sensible and not embrace the madness I guess. I'm really trying to save up money right now too to pay for tattoos, driving lessons and potentially a trip to Sweden to see two of my friends.

Two of my best friends were there tonight and it was just great to be with them again. It really did feel like old times. I really do miss them but I think it's just hard for them to find the time. One lives quite a distance from me and the other works as a geophysicist so when he goes back to work on a boat, he can potentially be gone for 5-6 weeks. The night was relatively chilled, the music was awesome tonight. I was in the zone when Fatman Scoop came on. Me and my friend were word perfect on it. I'm not sure if that's something worth bragging about.

A few hours later and many many drinks and shots, we got around to talking about "feelings". A topic I was pretty keen to avoid. There was clearly an elephant in the room in regards to my situation with my ex girlfriend and moving back home etc and I didn't really want to raise it or talk about it because it's just not productive, it won't change anything. It just feels like you're bashing your head against a brick wall. People tried to engage with me and discuss it but I just kept it as brief as I could. She's doing really good now so I'm happy for her.

I feel like my eyes are about to fall out of my head so I'm just gonna collapse into bed now.