Scream Above the Sounds
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2018-04-17 23:58:26 (UTC)

This ain't Mario Kart.

Today wasn't bad. I say "today". I've only been up about 6 hours but it's been okay so far. I'm probably going to try and get back to sleep soon so I can have a bit of a "normal day". Tonight is finally the night I'm going out driving! Pretty excited for it, I'm determined to do well. I've always been good at racing games but I know this ain't Mario Kart or Need for Speed. It could potentially be Burnout though...hopefully not though, haha.

My plans prior to driving are just to get my haircut. My hair has been so long for too long. I can't remember the last time I got it cut. I bet it was around my birthday in January. I'm going to shave my beard completely as well. I look a right state. Imagine Alan Parrish from Jumanji, that's literally me right now. I'd say I'm a 5/10 in terms of my looks but this hair and beard sends me down to a 2. So yeah, get that done and then who knows? A few of my friends (who are nerdier than me, believe it or not) do some board game night thing on Wednesday's usually. I always get invited but I never go. I always feel out of place there. I get on with them all really well and I love board games but they are into D&D (Dungeons & Dragons). You'd think that was probably my scene because I love role playing games and obviously did some acting but I just can't get into it. I haven't really tried to be honest. Maybe I'd thrive if I just let loose and had fun with it. My friend asked me if I wanted to come with him and then we'd go driving afterwards but I'll probably give it a miss. I still don't think I'm ready to be "released" back into society just yet. Give it a few weeks...I'm still emo and probably a bit of a killjoy.

I really need to start socialising soon though. I understand how unhealthy it is to just confine myself to these 4 walls but I don't really know any different. I think I'm going to organise a night out next month or something. It's been a long time since I've drank properly. It's probably a recipe for disaster but it would be nice to see some old faces.

I think the plan for tonight is just to go to an empty car park and see how I fare. I think I'll be fine. I should have learned how to drive so long ago but better late than never right?