Scream Above the Sounds
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2018-04-10 20:02:44 (UTC)

You Should Have Killed Me When You Had The Chance

I should probably stick to one entry a day but it's tough when you haven't got anybody else to listen right now. This is just the best way to get stuff out there and relieve well, anything I guess. I really do come here and try to have the most positive outlook I can. I'd love to post happier or more interesting things. The glass isn't even half empty at this point, it's completely smashed up. I really hope I can look back in time and see how far I've come. Something has to change.

I'm currently listening to A Day To Remember, hence the entry name. This is probably my favourite song by them. Anybody interested in rock music should check them out. I suppose it's more pop punk/metalcore, I don't really know. All I know is, they're fucking good!

I think I'm going to study something. My mum dropped the "You're almost 30" bomb on me earlier today. Asked me what I wanted to do and I said I still wasn't sure. I always loved drama and acting. I had done some extra work on Casualty and Doctor Who in the past and auditioned for Star Wars, The Force Awakens. I attended some local drama workshop schools here and met some really cool people. I just never stuck it out. So yeah, I'm a quitter too. One of many things you'll come to learn about me. Acting and music is more or less what got me through high school. It was an exhilarating feeling to jump into a character and just leave myself behind, even for 20-30 minutes. It's a weird sense of freedom when you're acting that you can be somebody completely different and I loved that. I think I resent myself way too much. Pursuing acting just felt like an impossible ask, I think it comes down to "who you know". I didn't really know anybody that could help elevate me or send me in the right direction.

I never really looked at having an agent. I probably should have. It's never too late I guess.

I think I'd be interested in studying creative writing or journalism, something like that. Prior to this diary, the only things I've written are articles for a Pro Wrestling website. I'd love to continue doing something like that. Whether it would be helping promote the guys I'm with now or on a bigger platform.

So yeah, I think the plan is to learn how to drive and study something.

Hope everybody has a good day/night.


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