My daughter called me yesterday to ask me if I will be paying for half her fees when she goes into secondary school in September as she says she wants to go to that school. Obviously her mum is using psychology on her, telling her that she wouldn't go to the school unless her dad pays half the fees as she can only afford half. The mum knows that I wouldn't sign the papers for the new school to commit to paying the fees if she continues to enforce that i pay child maintenance as my salary does not allow me to pay both which i have explained to her several times but its like talking to a brick wall. The sad thing is that she can easily afford to pay the fees. i am not even suggesting that she pays the fees I am saying that (as she earns double what I earn and i cant afford to pay both) I am happy to pay half the fees but clearly she is not having that. I explained to my daughter I cant pay both and if her mum insist on both then she may have to go to a free school. I will not let the mum use my daughter to blackmail me into committing to something I cant sustain. We are still owing fees from last term as the fees money I paid her for last term she has taken as maintenance money.
Now my son's school have written that he will be excluded from school when the term starts next week and I am sure the same fate awaits my daughter from her school. My children are actually quite calm about this. I also explained the situation to my son (again) and he understands my position. The sad thing is that their mum has enough savings in her account (from money she hid away during the divorce and the money from the sale of my land) not to demand maintenance (as well as school fees) until i get a job that will allow me to pay both but we are dealing with a very unreasonable person so there you go.
She is the primary career of the children and makes decisions about their schooling without consulting me and also abruptly changes the weekend I should have access to them so she should deal with the situation. I have explained to the schools I have made payments for last term to her and will make payments for this term in installments (to them). I cannot do beyond this.