Do Not Disturb
Should I start a Youtube channel???
I wanna start a Youtube channel but I'm afraid... Afraid of what other people may think and that's a problem. At least for me... "It won't hurt to at least try" but if I try them what... I just don't think I'm ready to show my talent... At least to the world. I'm afraid... Afraid of the means... The comments... What will they say? Will they hate me? Will they like me? "It doesn't hurt enough to at least try" but the problem is I don't wanna try. Maybe I'm just not ready to cut out for it. You know the fans,the photography,the lights,cameras,ect...
I went to the casino the second time go round but the only reason why I went was becauae my mom wanted me too. I'm not to big on casinos and besides I'm only 19 I haven't had the full experience. It was very... Interesting. Especially the people around you. We're talking about a place where you can drink and smoke but no worries their are officers but not enough. Their was this one particular girl that kept starring me with the up and down look not knowing why but it was creeping me out. She was probably just jealous. Everyone always are. I got my brother Xbox360 since he got the new xbox one for christmas from last year and now.that O habe his old xbox ( of what use to be my other brother Jonathan) I can watch any type of movies I want. So, I decided to watch the movie " Carrie" that movie is so.messed up in so many ways of how this one.particular girl bullied her and for what... No reason at all but in the end she died and I forgot exactly how. She had some type of telepathic powers ( I hope I said that right or at least spelled). So, yea.I can relate to her A LOT I mean except for the period fiasco. Because when I had my first period at 13 I was mortified... Or is it terrified... Whatever works... And that wss only because I didn't know what the h*ll was going on at the time and that wasn't until I told my mom and she started balling her eyes out. Tears of joy. But yep that's how I got my FIRST PERIOD and at least it happened while I was in the bathroom. I would TRY and write in here everyday as much as possible but not saying that I will. We will be going to a restaurant nothing fancy "Applebee's" this up coming Wedesnday and next Saturday she will be throwing a party here at the house. I mean as long as no one goes in my room then I'm all ears. At least I.did a few things today. I talked to bae until he went ro worked and.once he got their he told me that he will call me on his lunch break and I will be ready when he calls me and when that happens I will be happy ( which is weird because I'm only happy when I'm with him). He better call me and the only reason why why I'm always calling him is becayse forgets things and he always claims that he's always busy ( which could be true or he's could be sleep) I just hope that he doesn't especially with me but I forget things more than anything. Sometimes I'm a very slow person and that's just in general. The only reason why I blocked Tony ( my obssesive ex of a stalker) on Instagram os because so he won't start stalking me again like before ( even tough I blocked him on Facebook and as well as Messenger as well). I'm so glad that I'm dome with his a** but then again he broke up with me ( which is a good thing). I don't know what I ever saw in him but I guess things happen for a reason. I finally have a boyfriend that treats me right and as many times I say it... Its because its true. And nothing will get in the way of that not him ( my ex) nor anyone else for that matter. It better nor be anyone else. I'm trying so hard to trust him right and its just very... Hard.
Write more as soon as possible
The Forgotten One