Aria

Change for better
2017-10-23 00:22:48 (UTC)

The chaos

November 3,2017
11 am
Everything's so messed up. Why can't I find any companion here? No one's the kind I would like to hang out with.
So today I asked fatso to mark my attendance for two classes as I was bunking whole day to study for Maths test. I had fever the previous day and I just needed a break to get my shit together. But no, he got caught for that and now the whole class knows that I asked him to do that. Bitch , I didn't ask him for that subject. Plus the test got cancelled. The thing is , I don't want to take his help , or be with him.
He's weird and I don't want to be seen with him. But I have no other choice as I got no friends. I won't hang out with him as people think he's my boyfriend by the way he behaves with me and I HATE THAT.
Secondly I'm so mad at my roommate right now- Lets's call her selfish bitch. Intro- she's dominating and doesn't care for others. Yesterday I asked her to accompany to me to clinic as I had 100F temp and she refused. And she's gonna be all laughing and pitying at me due to the scene created today and the fact that I bunked for no good. I wanted a roommate with whom I can share all my secrets but I can't because she's going to judge me for that. You don't want your friends to be fake and hide your real feelings.
Third is Andrew (name changed) . He's only interested in getting physical with me. He talks to me only when he wants to kiss. I think it was a big mistake to let him kiss me. I just don't get him. Why he has so much attitude? Maybe I let people treat me as trash by being nice and real. But sure thing- I'm never going to kiss him again. He doesn't deserve me.
Today I need to introspect. I'm going to some garden alone and be with myself. Do I really need to be with these people just so I don't remain alone? I'll find people whom I can call my friends and be the real me.




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