inbetween

inbetween
2017-10-06 22:06:26 (UTC)

I'm so stuck, I've been stuck ..

I'm so stuck, I've been stuck for a long time. It's me that's the problem. I can't figure out what I want so I have no motivation. Everything is this consuming, existential maelstrom and it's tormenting me so I distract myself with whatever I can. The distractions eat up my time and I'm too scared to look for what I want. Who am I? This is a question I've asked since I understood the concept of identity. But who can I become? I keep telling myself that I just need to get these things straightened out and then it'll be better. I'll feel more grounded. More alive. But that's a lie. There's no guarantee I'll feel any different, that it'll really change anything. But there's a small chance I can make it happen. I know partly what I want. It's just the same old question of how to get there.




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