✯Sincerely, Me✯

☯LivingWithMyself☯
2017-10-01 00:27:30 (UTC)

Wish I had Friends

Dear Reader,

I guess I'm just way too sensitive, because I asked Nick if he wanted to Skype, and he said he didn't know.
I asked him why not, and he said he might be doing something with his friends later..

And when I read it, I just instantly just teared up, and started crying.

I know it's stupid, but I just I don't know. First of all, I was jealous.. of him wanting to hang out with them, instead of me,
secondly jealous of him having friends, and me just.. having him.

I have two other people I talk to. Chris, and Jon.. and they're great, don't get me wrong.. but there's not a lot we can talk about...

Nick is my best friend, and he's been there for me.. and I'm so lucky to have him in my life..

But he's all I have... and when he's not available, that means I'm pretty much alone.

He's going to school now too, so he's gone for most of the day.

I get it, he's just one person, he has a life, he has things to do.

Which is why I wish I had other friends to hang out with, so that when he's busy doing his own thing, I won't be alone. I wish I had friends in person too, so I could like get out of the house.. and just have normal experiences like going to the movies, going out to the eat.. sitting in the car talking for hours.

I just feel, so alone... ever since J passed away, and I broke up with Josh..


It's just been rough. I cry all the time.. I think about both of them constantly..

It helps to stay busy.. but being alone just makes it raw all over again.


Sincerely,
JustHere




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