nostresssprout

Young Sprout
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2017-05-29 04:06:47 (UTC)

Stay

I've learned to be alone because not everyone will stay, remember when you said you'd stay? I need you sometimes it's to hard for me to be alone and I need someone to talk to even if we don't really talk about anything, I just need to talk to you to feel okay to know you're there. So many nights I feel so many things I cry so hard that I can;t breathe and my body shakes I bury my head into my pillow so no one hears, I do a lot of things so people won't hear. Sometimes I'm happy and sometimes I'm numb but no matter what I'm feeling or what I'm thinking, I am always thinking about you. Please don't get mad when I ask if you love me or if you will actually stay. I'm trying hard but I need reassurance because I feel like no one likes us and that nobody will stay even though deep down I know it's stupid.

SOMETIMES I WANT YOU TO LEAVE, but you tell me you won't. I am toxic and even though I believe that you will hurt me I think I know that I will hurt YOU, because I am no good but as soon as you leave I fall over and shake tears running down the floor blade in hand trying not to cut trying not to hurt you, but as I see your car leave the driveway or as I see you happy with other people I wish I could ask for help instead of leaving the worst of it for when I'm alone.


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