When I told You...
When I said, "you'd never be able to tell, until I snapped but it's been like this for a long time." as a response to you asking "How did this happen?"
I didn't expect you to say that we could go back and relive some things, because you were never the problem, and what I should have said when I didn't explain... is that what I meant was you would never be able to tell until I snapped because I am always most genuinely happy with you so nothing is fake and for a while there is no pain, and because you are always there when I'm with you, you don;t get to see the bad side, and you don't have to see the fake side.
So I apologize for not explaining.