always wth love
He said "you" almost lost me for good
We left a bit late going to the art museum, the drive was bout an hour away it wasnt the part that make me break apart , on our way back home he told what i had said in our friendship was the time i thought would never be something? He said "you" almost lost me for good.
i wonder why he waited so long to tell me on saturday it was right? he got me speechless and afraid how easy sooo nice and patient with me. I just felt very disappointed in myself, i felt do hurt i still do. Seeing his growth since February up to now has made feel so scared dont want be stupid around him at all. I dont want show any weakness when am with him, but the way he kissed was something i never get to explain because i felt so happy with him. I just cant believe i almost lost him when we were just seeing him as friend back then, gosh am so stupid. Making a lame excuse wasnt so childish ugh! :( it just makes matter really bad and called for "sign". He told me you learned from it but, it wasnt all right at all. He felt sorry bout saying but why would he his a guy a really nice guy speaking his mind and shouldn't feel bad over some girl didnt know how make conversation with a guy before? it was all my fault, and i have to live with it. I just feel so torn apart bout this, honestly i had asked him if want be his gf? Yes. So now i gotta work harder on myself so dont so stupid to lose him again, just cant do it. He communicated with me and that was only i knew what was bothering him, just cant bare this sadness right now. i love you James, i wont say anymore stupid shit again to you i promise. Now am thinking is it good idea to be with me on birthday because what i said something personal too soon again? i just hopes feeling leaves my mind today. bye, your girlfriend next door.