always wth love

Venusgurl
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2017-02-17 14:33:48 (UTC)

Small Doses

Last night I was super busy doing homework, I was trying limit my time with this paper for one my classes I didn't want deal all the pressure not submit it on time and not getting help by volunteer tutors. So? I didn't text my man that night, but did enjoy a bit of time alone I wasn't sad at all. I need to focus what had get done around this earliest morning till afternoon shaping me. I had separated all the things that tasks at hand for next week its a short week considering its President day (monday). I feel very accomplished what I got done all this hard work is paying off. I know can fight those negativity comments. its just going to take time for me to ignore how it effects me deeply.
I have rethinking going to therapy thou, I honestly think that's only way I can feel better. I know I need it because I don't want this destroy my love towards James.
But I don't how to bring this darn topic to him an asking him to take a professional....Hmmm.
Around 7 most likely it was 8at night that I was still working on my paper when my sis "aunty" is talking me while she was in the loft hallway she wanted to know what me and James spoke about night before I gave typical one lines but she thought I said "makeout" I said No, (I didn't say that all you didn't hear me cause id my head down writing my paper) she didn't know that didn't care about my feels. I tired once again I said I said "hangout" she said me "your words are nothing I want action!" You wonder why we don't speak to each other unless am in trouble or just asking me a question.
I am mess lately its because the pressure wanted that approval.
I don't know when am gonna see my man hopefully soon because I really need before I might lose state of mind.


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