šŸƒAmanda22Janeā¤

Ghost Writer
2017-01-31 00:00:00 (UTC)

Day-@-Home Tuesday.

16:33 NZDT.
I'm home because I've not been contacted to work today. I haven't curled up into a foetal ball of victim mode, I've taken calm action. I wrote TMF a couple of texts. Either I work tomorrow, or I don't come back. I doubt that I will get paid as he keeps saying so. He's never paid me before for slaving away on his rental properties. Oh well at least I got around $50.00 of wine out of him. Plus I had a ball swiping his cigarettes. It's a game to him and his mother to keep me in the place they have always had me : a slave. Sad isn't it? The good thing is that it's money that I don't have to declare because I won't be getting it. I know I won't. I've started saying no and that sick fuck male friend of mine hates it. He is hating watching me change and has become more hostile, accusatory and contrary. Returning no for no. He has little power over me any more, so does landlord B., who wants my rent money but doesn't want me to live here.


I'm tired of being people who don't want to get well. Or deny they're sick.


I just want out. The wine is not a working "out". It's running away. Drinking so I CAN stand being around these people...no...it's not working.
Written enough. This stuff tires me. Need to keep on taking good care of myself today. I have some great food to look forward to very shortly. Made a pot of vegetable soup last night. Still plenty left. Been eating well today. And enjoying my resting and the peace.




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