atomheartmother03

A Saucerful of Secrets (Warning - Sexual Content!)
2016-11-16 15:53:14 (UTC)

Where are all the good times? Who's gonna show this stranger around?

For some reason, "he" is creeping back into my thoughts.. I don't want him there, but there he is..

I think it's because I need sex.. But not just sex, I need some really good sex.

My husband and I don't have much sex these days, and when we do, it's very rare anymore that we have good sex.

I need someone to just fuck the hell out of me, and then fuck me again.

I have found my self fantasizing A LOT lately about someone I've never even met. Even though I've only 'known' this person a short time, I feel like I've known him a long time.. I really have developed a lot of feelings for him. Not just sexual feelings, but feelings in general. But, even though the feelings are real, that is all that is real. In reality, we both have separate real lives to live with real people in them. However, with this person being on my mind so much, I've been able to block "him" out much easier.

It wasn't until last night when I was thinking about my life that "he" started coming back into my thoughts..

I was thinking about what if I left my husband.. What would happen? How would things be?

And then I started thinking that if I did leave my husband, the first thing I would do would be to finally have sex with "him". Would it go beyond that? I seriously doubt it. I mean, he's told me before he just wants sex, so I don't expect that it would turn into anything else. Would my feelings for him get deeper if we had sex? Maybe..probably..I hope not, though.. But, right now, I don't even care about that. I just want out of this marriage. Whether, I'm able to get out is a different story. I want out, but I still haven't had enough courage to actually get out.. And even though I want out, I don't want to hurt my husband.. So, I'm just in a bind. All I know now, is I need some good sex! lol

Does any of this change how I feel about the man I've developed feelings for, but never met? Hell no! I may not know him in 'real' life, but the feelings I have are definitely real. I miss him like crazy when I can't talk to him and I'm happier than I've ever been when I am talking to him. But, we both are married, with someone else already on the side, and we live who knows how far apart. So, what we have is in 'fantasy land' alone because there are far too many things that would have to fall in line for it to be anything else. But, I'm happy with that. I'm happy in knowing that even though nothing can come of this in real life, we still have something..

So, while I wish it could be this man from 'fantasy land' fucking my brains out and I wish I could get "him" completely out of my head, the reality of it all is that if I ever get the chance to have sex with "him", I probably will.

I'm not really sure where I was going with this entry, other than I need to be fucked very badly..




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