Darkcrow

Beatrice
2016-10-23 22:07:56 (UTC)

The Night I Spent w/ Keith <3

I have 29 entries.

I also noticed that the entire time that I've written an entry. I haven't written about my sex life. Like..at all. None.

So I guess I should start today...although...I haven't had sex in a few weeks. Sadly...it's actually been...I think...I don't know. I need to check. I think two weeks. Two weeks minimum. Sadly.

Ugghh. It's hard for me process my sex life. Especially on paper. Not sure why but it's something that I do. Oh well.

Let's try to think of a special time where the sex was amazing. The night we spent together :)

I don't it was the sex itself that made me feel special. The whole night was something else entirely. At least it was from my perspective. Let's think again.

I remember having a lot of stuff when I went there. I can't recall if I even had my purple blanket. I just don't really remember all those different kinds of things. I guess it's too minor. I guess I just can't think straight right now. Maybe because I'm listening to House. (The show.)

Okay think..the night I spent the night. We didn't TV on the TV. I remember telling him that it was okay that we watched whatever on his mom's laptop. He tried so hard that night. He got us a lot of things to eat, we watch Disney movies, hell I even got us soda. Now that I think about it, it was a lot more than we both needed. It was like...3 bottles I think? I can't really recall that great. Anyways, we watched Disney movies, one was Mulan 2. Keith kept calling everything that happened.

Now, I don't really know how it happened but...we were kissing. Passionately. Thinking about it now gives me that fuzzy, foggy feeling of a perfect mix of love and lust. I kind of wondered while we were kissing if we were going to have sex on the couch or not. Eventually we ended up going to him mom's twin bed. It had been years since we both had sex on a twin bed. He laid down the comforter he brought with him from his house on his mothers bed.

This memory is still foggy but...it's comforting. Our clothes were stripped from another. (I'm not sure if he took mine off or vise versa or if we even took them off ourselves.) It wasn't cold. I wasn't uncomfortable. And most of all, I wasn't scared. I was comfortable laying down in the dark on to be cuddled by his strong arms and his warmth. There's something special about the way he holds me before we make love that just keeps me so close to his heart.

He made me lay down and he kissed me all over. My arms, legs, my (ugly) stomach. Everything. He whispered to me. He said things that made me feel bliss. It was so sweet. I may not recall everything that was said in that bedroom that night but it was something that I'll always look back on with kindness.

I think he said something along the lines of "I love..." right before he would kiss me. It was special.

I wonder, though, if he felt the same. I remember doing what he did but more intimate. I kissed every limb, both arms, legs, his stomach, his penis, his neck, and his lips. For everything I said, he knew another reason I loved him. It may have been straight physical or it could have been mental but he knew. He knows.

If he's anything like me, he doesn't remember what was said, but he knows every reason that I love him. Or in this case, some. There's endless reasons that I love him. Maybe a year or two back, I probably would have thought, "there's just an expression. there's literally a finite number of reasons I love him." But I really don't think it's possible to number all the reasons I love him. Especially when there are reasons that I love him that I can't quite put into words. Infinite is actually accurate now.

Anyways, the love making itself...ughh..anxiety to even write about this...okay here I go...

After I finished kissing him and expressing my love to him, he got up. We both sat up on the bed. In the moment, I kissed him. And slowly we kissed until my head hit the pillows. And just as he always does, he looked me in the eyes and asked "Are you ok?" I consented with a smile and yes.

He entered me. I don't remember it being too fast. But it was just enojugh to make breath play catch up. The love and passion and lust, and pleasure filled the room, my ears, my heart. But it was quiet.

Knowing that the walls in that room were paper thin, we could really say anything too loudly. So, we only spoke through whispers in the night. He kept talking to me as he continuously pushed himself inside me. I can't remember what he said. Perhaps it was something about planning our future together.

As always though, I came. He always seems to know exactly when it happens. His timing is still off though. Just...a lot. He doesn't how to make that moment a little extra...pleasurable. I guess is the word. Yet, it was still right that night. My poor love bug was getting tired. So I got on top and had him enter me. "Go slow," he whispered. I didn't go crazy like I normally do. I just laid on his chest and moved my hips around and listen to he soft grunts as our love making when on.

And you know what, I don't remember what else happened. I can't remember if I ate his semen, if he came inside me, if...we switched positions again (which isn't uncommon for us) but the rest of the night was kind of a blur.

We went back to the couch and slept. But Keith went to his mom's bed in the middle of the night because he couldn't sleep but other than that, everything was good. Everything was gravy (don't know why I thought of that). Next time I have sex with him, I should write about it that day. I don't really talk about having sex much. Maybe it would be healthy if I wrote about it.

Even when I did talk about it with my girlfriends it made me feel kind of giddy. Like I'm talking about something that's so taboo. You know?




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