AMom

Reasons?
2016-07-16 03:57:31 (UTC)

My sins

You might wonder why I have such self hate. Could it b I made everyone uncomfortable? I was the "elephant" big problem in the room?

I'll list them:
1) I was conceived.
My mom and dad conceived me on December 24, 1967 about 9/10pm. How do I know? I was born September 23, 1968 at 1032 pm. Mathematically I figured it too 30 minutes of foreplay (9-9:30) and a hour (9:30- 10:30) for the sperm to swim then penetrate the egg. I once told my mom this and to her chagrin, I was right. I'm smart!

I think it would have been easier for me to b aborted or adopted out. He was 21 and she was 19 when I was born. My mom was 5 months pregnant when they married. It was Viet Nam era. He was on a one day leave, quick wedding and night. Sorry I attended both :(

I am very much PRO-LIFE, I just hate myself so much because of my past.


2) I was born female.
Let me explain. I was always the "elephant in the room." The problem that is there, but you try to ignore it.

My mom was molested by her stepfather when she was a kid. Made her a little off. No she's not crazy, just had issues. Biggest issue was she was worried my dad would molest me. He never did. Threatened D (her step-dad) with death if he ever touched me. Needless to say, my relationship bwith your "first love" daddy was always strained. Daddy's are how a girl learns to trust men. They love them and learn not to fear them.

3) Man's genetic pride.
Men are always prideful of their sons. Because I was female, big problem, I was not what a dad wants. He wants longevity, a mirror image, and a pass on to future generations. All because of genealogy and surnames. Us females suck!

Dont get me wrong, I don't think he hates me. I just make him uncomfortable.




Ad: