trash post by trash man
The world I've carved out for myself is collapsing in on... itself.
This has been the worst year to date, no hyperbole. My mother-in-law died, suddenly and fucking tragically. About the least amount of warning possible for a fucking cancer diagnosis.
(Cue ADD or brain damage or whatever the fuck is fucking with my ability to think and write in a focused manner.)
And I'm just the disabled fucking son-in-law who grew close to her and came to think of her as my own mom (as my birth mom is 900 kilometers away and whom I see twice a year).
I literally can't write anymore. Agitated, can't focus, tired... I'm trapped in this shrinking prision of liquefying mental acuity. Im losing my wife, life - everything because the last bastion of ability I had that was sharp and proficient is fucking failing me.
Texting someone, conversating for more than a few minutes is tedious and taxing. My vision I know is playing a large role in this. My emotional perceptions. FUuuuuc.k
There is no focus.
There is no joy.