Darkcrow

Beatrice
2016-06-21 21:33:30 (UTC)

Scrambled

I feel like my thoughts are kinda just everywhere right now. I mean...I shouldn't right? I just got everything straightened out kinda.

I don't know. It just seems like everything is just coming at me at the same time...but crazy thing is...they've been there the whole time. It sucks.

Idk. I just ugh!

I need to get like...everything in order. Friends, relationship, school, loans, scholarships, essays, modules, video games, hobbies. I'm just scared. Scared? No, unsure? Confused...Oh wait what was that one word from before? Consternate. But...that doesn't fit in a proper sentence here huh? Guess not. Oh well. Not the point. My whole schedule has been

Ooh! Got a text from Kat :D Barely have talked or hung out with her after my graduation party. Which sucks. I miss her.

I just made plans to hang out on Saturday after work. Shit I just felt a super sharp pain in my spine? Yeah but not quite. Like it branched off or something. Whatever. I'm fine.

Now...my health is actually becoming an issue. I get paid tomorrow. I think I need to take better care of me. I could buy zucchini and grill it for myself :) Make myself smoothies. Which reminds me, I have read to buy some soap stuff for the house. Laundry detergent. That's what it's called.

I could start working out more but...ugh I have to find out how to make the work for me too. Friends (which is a sort of check), then well...work is always...there..in fact I make my life mold around my job and my relationship. Which isn't bad. At all!

I mean really I like my job. And I absolutely love my Boo Bear <3 But where do my friends, hobbies and...wow lost my train of thought already...Whatever. Regardless, both Keith and my job will be gone by August. Well...my friends will be too however, it's still nice to be normal...in your own way.

Seriously, I literally don't have friends. No I'm lying. I have friends. Kat and well and Keith..plus...all the friends I DID have at my old store...um...Amber? and um...Sydney and I were friends..sort of...well agh! Okay I had Ashlie and Lauren. Which reminds me, I need my book back. From Lauren and Scott. Maybe I could see Scott again. I wonder how he and his girlfriend are doing. Maybe lunch? We could probably have lunch together. Scott and I haven't had lunch together since middle school. That sounds nice. Well...Ron! Ohh and Bri! Shoo....who else? Got dammit. What else? I have Alicia and Bre too. Although they're a little bit older than me. No biggie. Alex? HELL NAH! Fuck that. I'm ok without her whoring around. It's okay.

I think that's all the friends that I actually have haha besides Lauren Benoit. Oh pf course Meagan too. Let me see how many i named. Eleven. Well...I actually think I'm okay with that many friends. Maybe I could try hanging out with Kayla Moye. I never hung out with her outside of school. Yeah :)

Yet again, I have some much more I want to write but I'm a little tired at this point so...bye :P




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