nerd™

the anger games
2016-03-23 09:55:07 (UTC)

I give up

I don't know what to do. Fuck . I give up. I don't wanna get a good collage. Or job. Or husband. Or life. I just want this stress to end. I fuckin hate myself. I am so fuckin stupid. I really wanna cry. I am not made for this. This is not what I am supposed to be doin. I don't know what I want. I don't want to live anymore. Fuck everything. I just want curl in bed and kee my eyes shut forever.
I REALLY WANNA CRY BUT I CAN'T WTF
I can already picture the disappointed faces . I already feel the guilt.
I know its not too late but I also know that I will never do anything useful. Its not too late for everyone but me.
Because the habits of years aegis not unlearned so quickly
Because daydreaming is killing
Because u can't recycle wasted time
Because every single damn deep quote that ever existed. I am screwed beyond repair. and maybe if I am lucky enough. in 4 years time when its 2020 I will open that notebook and write that I got rid of the daydreaming. I will write that I failed in everything else but at least I will be in the real world. I don't how this will happen but I give up. maybe one day my 11:11 wish will come true




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