Fuck I've needed to vent all day. It..
Fuck I've needed to vent all day. It just builds up inside me and I feel a bit insane and any little thing makes me flip because I just need to write about it.
I hate that I always end up seeing the worst in people. First it's little things, the way they speak, how intelligent they are, how they walk. But it just gets worse and I end up hating everything about them like how they act all the fucking time. It happens every fucking time. I can't help but focus on the negatives of people over time. I thought Tom was nice, but I ended up just not being attracted to him because of all these little things. After I stopped being involved with him romantically it just got worse, he fucking never takes the blame for anything. Everything is always someone else's fault. He was mad because I didn't date him? He told me not to be afraid because of my previous experience with... Jacob. Then he goes and starts chatting up one of my close friends? ahaha how the fuck does that work, I love how things people say just don't matter anymore over time like nothing anyone ever fucking says matters because they'll never fucking stick to it.
I need to stop feelings things for Brad. If he wanted me like that he wouldn't fall asleep when we're talking, I know that's pathetic, but you know when it's some you're really interested in you stay up all night talking to them, the conversation never dies and when you're on the verge of falling asleep you always make sure to fucking say goodbye. I know it's stupid but it's true. I always make all the fucking effort with him but why am I fucking surprised I'm the one that makes all the effort with people. I don't fucking care anymore I'm cutting everyone off. I'm sick of it. I'm so sick of it.
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