Just Another Life Journal
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2015-08-18 13:12:58 (UTC)

What Does Lonely Feel Like?

Are you lonely?
No, let me rephrase that question: Have you ever feel lonely?
Have you ever feel that although you're in the middle of the crowd, you're by yourself?
Have you ever have so many people who talk to you, but you can't actually TALK to any of them?
Have you ever feel that no one is there when you need them?

Have you ever try to distract yourself from the emptiness in your heart by doing anything, just ANYTHING?
Have you ever laugh with other people but you only laugh because that's what you think they expect from you?
Have you ever cry for no reason before sleep or during your shower?
Have you ever wanted to have a significant other, hoping they will drag you out of this feeling?

Have you ever feel it's useless to talk about your problems to other people?
Have you ever think that no one will be damaged by your death? Sure they will be sad, but damaged?
Have you ever think that it's fine even if you die young although you still have a lot of things to do?
Have you ever squeeze yourself into a crowd hoping you'll feel less.... empty?

Have you?

Well, I never feel any those things.
I like being by myself.
I don't want to talk to others unless I need to.
I don't actually expect anyone to be there for me, I can take care of myself.

I don't do things to distract myself from anything.
I don't laugh on things that I don't find funny.
I don't cry anymore.
I don't need a significant other.

I don't talk about my problems to other people.
I don't bother to think of anything if I happen to die.
I want to die young because I don't want to do anything in this world.
I don't like crowds so I avoid it.

I never feel lonely.
I have myself.
I can talk to myself anytime I want.
I won't let myself down.

Other people will.

Can you tell me what it feels like? That loneliness?

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