✯Sincerely, Me✯

☯LivingWithMyself☯
2015-08-05 07:03:20 (UTC)

Dear Zak

Dear Zak,

If I could talk to you filterless, this is what I'd say.

I think you pretend to like me.

Because you feel guilty.


I feel like,
you do everything you can to escape a conversation with me.

I know if I feel that way, I should just stop talking to you altogether.. but then I get to thinking maybe it's just me.
Maybe it's because I'm not trying hard enough...
or maybe I'm trying too hard... or maybe It's all in my head.


I do know that I might be a friend... I'm not a close friend.

What you told me today, made me so happy...
And somehow I felt like I needed to share some wisdom...
I know I'm not an expert... sorry if I acted like one.

In all honesty, I thought the advice would maybe prevent the crush from becoming anything more... I know why I thought it, and hoped it...I'm too ashamed to admit it.

I'm really sorry.

The advice I gave, wasn't fully in my best interest...
It also benefits you.. a lot. If you heed it.


I've been crying off and on for nearly 3 hours now.
I kept trying to put off writing this, but I decided to go ahead since tomorrow, I'd probably lose it.

When you said the second part...
It triggered something inside...
Jealousy, betrayal, sadness, uglyness...
and it just lead me to fall to my depression and crying over any little thing...
Including parts to the movie Sybil.

It was a domino effect from there.


Tomorrow, I think I'll write your story.


I'm sorry.... for being me.
What you said hurt me.

But that's why I'm writing this...
to let it go.


Sincerely,
DANISH





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