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me and my life
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2015-06-22 07:31:18 (UTC)

it ended

Sujit had called me on 14th June after 2 months and 18 days. i was shocked to see his SMS. he said in that " karu can we please talk for a while :( " i was happy some wer inside that i can talk to him so i dint tell mommy that time i dint revert, he again sms thrice then i sms him Call at 10 coz mom n dad gets bz in TV that time. he called me and he was like i am sorry, are u angry n all. i cleared him how mean he is n i dont want him in my life again. clamly we talked he was crying. he said he mss me like hell n he is apologetic. i made him ralise abt his mistake n he realised (this hapens evrytme that he shows that i realised my mistake but he is same den) atast mom entered room n she asked whom m i talking to i said sujit n she was shocked & got tensed. was saying me not to talk i told her let me clear things wit him n she suddenly informed sis also she is uber hyper. then we ended call as i knew mom will again come to check n she did.

after 2 days on 18th i guess he again SMS me this time i knew he will. i said him to call wen i sms him coz dint wanted mom shud knw not for anyother reason but its just that we had an affair i loved him n he loved me so thier is somethings between us that mom will neva understand . nothing else. s after mom left my room after a talk at 12.56 i sms him "call" he did dis time he cried more, he begged, he tried to convice wic he neva did before. it was weaking me but i stood adamant. he said he doesnt like anythg he is not liking to work, not liking colors, not talking to anyone. i made him understand and also gave him lil hearing that how could he talk abt my mom so ill the women who gave u food wit clear heart. he was feeling guilty and sry. i said i forgive u for evrythg now better concentrate on work. i reminded him the time he was so wrong, lied fooled me he promised he wil not gain come back in my life we will have a new fresh real realtion but that is evrytime from him n i have had given him enough chances not this time. i told him not to call me or else ill change nmbr i also said him that i am liking talking to him so better we disconnect. i told him that he lost me, i do miss him we recokned our sweet time. he was miserable i was feeling vry sad but this time i was done means done. we vry hard n heavry heart i did dis. he may not understand dis now but later he will.
i hope he will tc of himself n he will move on. this happens wen u test patience of person without thinking abt them n den patience crosses the limit n u have to face the consequences.

baby, i am sorry i do love u, i do miss u, remembering our time makes my eyes wet i do think hope we cuold have been together but sometimes u have to do things wic are hard but necessary in life. my heart aches :( i do miss ur voice, our talks, ur touch ur stupid things but i am also helpless u r absoluty not right for me. love u shontu.
i wish we could spend our life together. i wish wish n wish ...

my time is vry bad
i am jobless
my boss refused to pay my 2 month sal 40k
he will soon give my papers
lets see wats restored for me. i am being patient


nothg else happning
struggling in life
duniya me aye ho tho jina hi padega.


i got lappy :D


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