LustingforNightmares

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2015-06-20 23:32:45 (UTC)

lgbwaleirugha

THIS IS FROM YESTERDAY, I FORGOT TO POST IT :/


"Drift" by Natalie Evans [her voice is so pretty, why is she so cute??]

"When I Goose-Step" by The Shins [this is a very important song]

Go along with the plan
Your head will still be there where you put it
Under the bed with the ice cream you could never find
And tonight you go to bed and dream
All the world to be what you want it,
You got the girly draw now flaunt it,
And keep them all checking their watches
When you're out tonight


11:51 PM

Caroline, Ethan, and I went for a walk. Wandered through the dark cemetery in search of good climbing trees, talked briefly about zombies because that conversation is inevitable.

I asked them if they ever get drawn towards certain tombstones (I was wandering towards a large one that said Mooradian, like the company, I think).

They said something that was probably like, "No, Veronica, you're creepy. This is why you don't have friends."

Ethan was smoking, ugh.

There is a large spider on the ceiling and it's freaky. My heart didn't jump in my chest, though. I used to feel like they were after me. I keep glancing at it, though, because I'm still afraid.

It has been several minutes and I don't think it has moved. Besides, it's facing away from me. Maybe it's sleeping. Maybe I should sleep.

I might have an appointment with Pat soon which is... really relieving. I need her help with things. Even if I were willing to speak about it with my friends, I doubt they'd be able to help me with it.

I'm concerned Pat might not even have anything profound to say that'll snap me out of those feelings, those memories, that guilt, that worry.

Not that stressed over it, though. Thinking, if this doesn't help, I'll die from carrying the weight but it doesn't feel so heavy when you have a finish line.

Finish life.

How do I end up writing so much about so little??? Okay, I'm sleepy.


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