Time Flies

Tempis Fugit
2015-06-13 18:52:04 (UTC)

Down

i can't think of a scenario that I have felt less of a person. Being the only option as a sole provider comes with so much responsibility, and I have done ok until now. Yeah we've been broke forever, but now I am likely losing my job. I have not worked in 3 months and I done see a path where my wife is well enough for me to work. My FMLA expires in less than 2 weeks and I have no plan B.

Luckily my parents have helped us during this time and I am so very grateful for that. On the flip side the support comes at a cost to others. I can't justify in my mind taking from other people... I just can't.

Anyway, life is a bitch right now. My wife and I are close but not in that way. We have not slept in he same bed for a year now and I guess I am pretty used to it. So are the kids and that's so sad. At every turn where I thought we were getting close to sharing a bed, she has an excuse. I can't breathe on he second floor is her big one. It could be true but the excuse about air conditioning is false because she keeps running it on the first floor.

I am sad, I am sad. I am sad.

I wish I saw a way out. It weighs on my every breath.




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