theolor

MyDarknessLives
2015-06-10 17:34:41 (UTC)

Unstable

Today my emotions have been all over the board, It started off good with me going swimming, and I had the pool to myself for the hour and however many minutes I was there. I love doing handstands and going underwater and doing flips and swimming backwards like a squid, I think water is my soul element and my spirit belongs with the water.

I must have forgotten to take my med this morning because later in the day I was looking for games to play and realizing I don't have any because I would always sell them for less then I got them to get other games and would keep doing that or sell them for gold on my tank game etc until I had nothing left. I played minecraft for a little while and I was feeling really sad and guilty that I had nothing left so I crawled into bed and went to sleep for a while.

A game came out yesterday that I want called the Elder Scrolls Online, and it is one of my favorite game series (ill post a link at the bottom) and so I asked my mom if I could get it, she said no so I did my usual pushing until she said maybe, she was going to do it until she found out it was $60 instead of 30 and then I felt really sad because I built my hopes up and it all came trembling down, I started feeling really sad and I started crying and she said she would give me 60 dollars from some check and then I started feeling really guilty and started crying harder. She did everything in the house today and I felt so guilty and I told her that she deserved better then me. I have been really unstable today my emotions are flying wild, it just goes to prove to myself more that I am too unstable to even work because sometimes I doubt myself and then this comes along to prove to me that I am not super crazy, I don't even know if this is making any sense........


Elder Scrolls (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Elder_Scrolls)




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