victorialovemcm

victorialove
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2015-06-09 02:08:59 (UTC)

Stuck and in evol

Sometime I feel trapped. Don't get me wrong though, i do love Tony. More than anything actually. It's just... he doesn't really listen to me or understand a lot of things. He's stubborn as hell. I feel as if I truly wanted to leave, i couldn't. Nothing is actually mine. The car I drive isn't "mine." Because he bought and paid for. You get what I mean? I'm stuck and in love. I literally want to get a buzz every single night, and i do just that and more sometimes. I do it to make myself happy and feel better around him. Is that love? Is this how it is supposed to be? Do many women do this or feel this way? Is this normal? Is this part of being an adult? These questions flow through my head on a daily basis. I mean every inch of my being does love him deeply and unconditionally. But that doesn't mean this is the key to my happiness. I feel as if he doesn't give me as much attention as i do him. Or am i just a self centered, attention seeking individual? How does anyone know the answers to all these logical, reasonable questions? Or is there even an answer? I ask myself more questions than i tell myself that i am, in fact happy. Is this normal, and is my relationship healthy? Does ever couple go through these questions and mind obstacles. These are the true questions in mind.


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