-M-

My Crazy, Amazing, Messed up Life
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2015-01-25 04:54:07 (UTC)

Protective Walls

I know it's selfish but I really don't want to go to the Hell that calls itself 'school'. I believe in learning while travelling.
High school is a place where peoples dreams go to die. Especially with my Devil of a Vice Principal.

Already I have bought lots of chocolate and sherbet to stock up my locker for this year :P
Especially since I have been through a break up recently. I won't stop getting crap from people for months about how I broke his heart and how I am a bitch and how I am all ways quiet and anti social.
The reason I am quiet and mind my own my own business is because in the past, before I built the wall and mask that I am safe from the world behind I was hurt, emotionally.
My friends in primary school took advantage of me being so naïve and made fun of me. And the worst part is that I didn't realise the had done that until something clicked in my head a year after I moved away.
I have sworn to myself that I would never be so naïve again and that no one will hurt me.

There have only ever been 3 person who haves gotten completely past all of my barriers. And they don't take advantage of me, and even though they know the true me they are still here. They have protected me and made me feel wanted and loved ever since we met. That is why they are my 3 bestest friends in the whole world. Friends and even sisters doesn't even describe how close we are. I guess that we are 4 parabatai. (From The Mortal Instruments - YOU HAVE NOT LIVED UNTIL YOU HAVE READ THEM.)
I even have a barrier that my family hasn't crossed.

I guess that is the reason that people call me anti-social.
And that I spend my mornings sleeping, my afternoons reading and my nights. Around shopping and library trips of course.

But I have my reasons for the walls built around me. They may crumble someday, but that day is not in the near future. And definitely not until I at least leave high school.

This is the second time I have ever expressed why I have my protective walls around me. The first time was to those 3 amazing people I wrote about. If you read this then you are 1 of the very few people that know the truth.


-M-


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