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2015-01-11 16:21:12 (UTC)

Veronica, Say Cheese

"Georgia" by Vance Joy

3:21 PM

I am trying to do a self-portrait for my portfolio (the portfolio is sent to Albany so the can decide if I am good enough to go to the New York summer art program).

I was going through my phone, trying to find a selfie that maybe I could draw. I think I'm going to do one of these

Anyway, I found a video on my phone that was dated recently but I didn't remember taking it so I watched it.

Sometimes, I let a kid in my last period art class play around with my phone while I'm working. The video was maybe a minute long and I hadn't known it was being taken.

The kid's name is Scott and I've known him since elementary school but we've never really been friends. He's just a nice guy and all, other than being kind of a slacker pothead.

The video he took is probably my favorite video of myself. I like how my voice sounds and I like how concentrated I am on my work and how I have a little frown on my face. I also liked how my hands looked as they held the paper down or dipped a brush in water.

It started kind of unfocused on a half finished work sheet that we were supposed to have worked on the day before (it was about mixing black and white paints. We had to create a gradient).

In the background, you can hear chattering but you can't understand anything anyone else is saying. A girl who sits was singing quietly and you can hear her voice as Scott swung the camera around.

You could hear him behind the camera saying, "That looks nice, Veronica."

The camera showed my hands on the other side of the table, holding down the paper and painting a tea kettle with watercolors. My voice said, "Thanks, man,"

And then you could hear the other girl saying, "Can I see?"

The camera swung to look at the print out of a tea kettle we were supposed to be copying and you could hear the rustle of papers. I handed my paper to the girl and she held it in one hand, saying "I like it." before handing it back to me.

Then, my hand appeared in the camera's view. I was holding a green paintbrush and I pointed the end of it at the middle of the tea kettle printout.

I said, "I really- I'm not gonna do this middle part because I don't know what that is."

Then, I dipped my brush in water and continued painting.

Scott showed me across the table, leaning over my paper with my hair pushed behind my ears. I looked up and he said, "Veronica, say cheese."

I wrinkled my nose and made a whimpering noise before covering my face, which is where the video ends.

It's kind of stupid but I kind of like videos of me taken when I'm unaware. I get to see how other people see me, how I appear outside of myself.

It's fascinating.