Vanilla

Holiday

i came back from seeing the family abroad 2 days ago...the holiday has actually refreshed me, I didn't realise how much i needed it

I almost forgot who i was until i read my last entry..

But for those 3 weeks, I was me..without my past, without my childhood. Adult me i guess...immature to them, but content, almost happy. I am currently building a life for myself and it feels good to feel like this...to not feel as lonely as i did a few months ago, intact I didn't even realise how alone i truly felt...it is weird how much of a difference the precence of people can make and i mean people who tell you its ok to trust them, its ok to ask for something, its ok to expect something in return. I never knew i was allowed to do all three...but i did...i actually did...i nearly blindly did it...and i expect...i expect certain things from people now because I have a right to.