2014-09-01 14:28:09 (UTC)


"Sedated" by Hozier

September 1, 2014 Monday 2:31 PM (Labor Day)

I am very tired, today. I don't feel like doing anything or my thoughts are going slow. If someone tries talking to me and I get mad, all thoughts leave my head for like three minutes. This is terrible.

I also feel really fat. I have for awhile, but yeah. I got annoyed at Lily today. She nominated me for that ice bucket challenge thing. I can't really place what I don't like about it.

I have already done it, but I didn't even want to do it then. I'm glad it's raising awareness and stuff, but I get bitter. I think that people just go along with this stuff so they feel like they're being good people.

Maybe it's just that I hate things that other people love too much. Like The Fault In Our Stars. I was the first of my friends to read that book and I loved it. Then, pretty much everyone ever starting reading it and falling in love with Augustus Waters (he's too sweet, he doesn't even seem real, is that what people want?).

That's when I began to hate it. I dunno. I never liked the ice bucket challenge but I thought it was alright since at least people were doing SOMETHING.

I really don't want to do it again, though, and I don't have $100 to donate. I'm probably not going to do it. That makes me feel guilty. I also would rather not be confronted by my friends for not doing it :/ Why am I stressing so much over this???? Lily got nominated twice and she only did one bucket. Why is it so bad if I do the same thing? okay I'M DONE thinking about this.

I renamed my diary.

Dysphoria - a state of unease or generalized dissatisfaction with life.

There. Sorry for being uninteresting and tired and blugh and *puts head down and sleeps forever*